Frank Boyle Cartoon Monday 12 July, 2010

Today . . .

Boyling Point

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Get Him To The Greek (Subtitled) (15) 8.10. Killers (12A) 12.30, 5.50. Predators (15) 11.00, 1.30, 4.00, 6.30, 9.00. Prince Of Persia: The Sands Of Time (12A) 10.00am. Sex And The City 2 (15) 2.20, 5.40, 8.50. Shrek Forever After (U) 9.50, 10.50, 12.30, 1.20, 2.50, 4.10, 5.20, 6.40, 8.00, 9.20. Shrek Forever After 3D (U) 9.20, 10.20, 11.30, 12.45, 2.00, 3.30, 4.30, 6.00, 7.00, 8.40. StreetDance (PG) 10.10am. Tooth Fairy (PG) 9.20am, noon. The Twilight Saga: Eclipse (12A) 9.40, 10.00, 10.45, 11.40, 12.15, 1.00, 1.40, 2.30, 3.10, 3.50, 4.50, 5.30, 6.15, 7.40, 8.30, 9.10, 9.30, 9.45. The Twilight Saga: Eclipse (Over 18s) (12A) 7.00.

REVIEW

Magic and Variety Gala Show

The Lyceum Theatre

HHHH

comedy

RED RAW: Where new comedians try out material for the first time, with the odd old pro popping in to show how it's done. The Stand, York Place, 8.30pm (7.30pm doors), 2 (1), 0131-558 7373.

music

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THE JAZZ BAR BIG BAND: Jazz classics from 17-piece ensemble. The Jazz Bar, Chambers Street, 7.30pm, 4 (3), 0131-220 4298

clubs

NU-FIRE: New DJs/producers showcase. Sneaky Pete's, Cowgate, 10pm, free, 0131-225 1757

MIXED-UP MONDAYS: request night for hip hop, urban, r&b and chart. The Hive, Niddry Street, 11pm, free, 0131-556 0444

CALL THE SHOTS: Total artistic control at this requests-only night. GHQ, Picardy Place, 10.30pm, free before 11pm, 4 (3) after, 0845-166 6024

DIRTY STOP OUT: The latest funky house, twisted with old school and R&B. Opal Lounge, George Street, 10pm, 4 before midnight; 5 after, 0131-226 2275

FORBIDDEN: VDJ Scott Granger entertains the hordes with R&B, hip-hop, urban electro and chart. Shanghai, Le Monde, George Street, 10pm, 5, 0131-270 3900

TRADE UNION: Night to give something back to the bar and club workers with everything except cheese. Cabaret Voltaire, Blair Street, 11pm, 2 (1), 0131-220 6176

lecture

ANOTHER WORLD OPENING LECTURE :Antony Penrose, the son of photographer Lee Miller and the painter and writer, Roland Penrose, presents a witty and intimate account of the lives of his parents and friends. Hawthornden Lecture Theatre - Weston Link (National Gallery Complex). 12:45, free. 0131-624 6200.

TUESDAY

comedy

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The Midweek Comedy Cabaret: Four acts for four quid. With Joe Heenan, Gordon Alexander, Derek Johnston and John Gavin. The Stand, York Place, 8:30, 4. 0131-558 7272.

music

THE SIX O'CLOCK BLUES & SWING TRAIN: Live acoustic blues from John Hurt. The Jazz Bar, Chambers Street, 6pm, donation, 0131-220 4298

CEILIDH CLUB: Regular ceilidh night featuring some of the best fiddlers, accordionists and rhythm sections from the most popular Edinburgh ceilidh bands. The Lot, Grassmarket, 8.30pm, 6, 0131-225 9922

GREAT JAZZ JAM SESSION: A night of jazz during which you just never know who is going to drop in to perform with the house trio. The Jazz Bar, Chambers Street, 8pm, 2 (1), 0131-220 4298

CLUBS

SOUL JAM: Hot soul, funk, good times. Sneaky Pete's, Cowgate, 10pm, free, 0131-225 1757

ANTICS: Rock, emo, punk and metal dispatches from Edinburgh's alt.scene. The Hive, Niddry Street, 11pm, free, 0131-556 0444

HYBRID: Underground dance, techno, dubstep, bass, jungle and more featuring a mixed line-up of DJs from Noizteez, Volume!, Big'n'Bashy, JakN, Riddim Tuffa and other Edinburgh institutions. The GRV, Guthrie Street, 11pm, free, 0131-220 2987

LOVE TRAFFIC: Gay clubbing night. Dale Lush supplies club anthems. GHQ, Picardy Place, 11pm, 4, 0845-166 6024

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MOTHERFUNK: Gino and Fryer are back with their Tuesday institution as they spin rare and classic funky assed, floor-shaking 60s and 70s grooves, deep funk, Latin, soul and so much more. Opal Lounge, George Street, 10pm, free, 0131-226 2275

SHAGTAG: Insanely successful night based on a complex numerical flirting system. Stereo, King's Stables Road, 10pm, 5, 0131-229 7986

SPLIT: Drum & bass, electro, techno and breakbeat with Shadowskill, the Dropout DJs, Dogma and a smattering of very talented local guests. Cabaret Voltaire, Blair Street, 11pm, free, 0131-220 6176

VIBE: Danceable tunes. Luna, Picardy Place, 11pm, 4, 0131-556 3553

WEDNESDAY

comedy

FRINGE PREVIEW DOUBLE BILL: Jojo Sutherland Goes for the Jocular, while Jason Cook contemplates what happens at The End (Part 1). The Stand, York Place, 8:30, 7. 0131-558 7272.

music

ACOUSTIC COCONUT: An array of singer/songwriters brought to you by local lad Gavin Duvet. Tonight featuring The Black Diamond Express. The Jazz Bar, Chambers Street, 9pm, 4, 0131-220 4298

ORGAN RECITAL: Clive Driskill-Smith perform an organ recital. St Giles' Cathedral, Royal Mile, 8pm, 8, 0131-226 0673

JAZZ BAR TRIO: Excellent house trio at their weekly outing. The Jazz Bar, Chambers Street, 8pm, 4 (3), 0131-220 4298

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GRAMOPHONE HOUR: Every Wednesday, 78's from 7 to 8. Forest Cafe, Bristo Place, 7pm, free, 0131 220 4538.

clubs

BANGERS & MASH STUDENT NIGHT: Cheese hosted by big cheese djs. The Hive, Niddry Street, free before 11, 2 for students. 0131-556 0444

CHAIRMAN MEOW: Calverto wows the crowd with an eclectic selection of chart, dance and indie. Shanghai, Le Monde, George Street, 10pm, 4, 0131-270 3900

CHAMBLES: Night of sexy music, fantastic cocktails and fabulous people. Dress to impress. Opal Lounge, George Street, 10pm, 5 (4), 0131-226 2275

THE PIT: Rock and metal night by rock and metal fans for rock and metal fans, featuring rock. And metal. The Hive, Niddry Street, 11pm, free, 0131-556 0444

WE ARE ELECTRIC: Edinburgh's leading punk-puink and electro disco experience. Cabaret Voltaire, Blair Street, 11pm, free before 12, 0131-220 6176

JERK ALERT: Indie, old rave and 90s hits. Sneaky Pete's, Cowgate, 11pm, free, 0131-225 1757

HIJACK WEDNESDAYS: Electro house and indie. Base, Cowgate, 11pm, 3 (2), 0131-225 7377

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I LOVE: Chart, cheese, indie and R&B. City Nightclub, Market Street, 10pm, 5 (4), 0131-226 9560

SUBTEXT: Electronic showcase with DJ talent from clubs such as Split, Kapital, Touch, Compakt and Coalition. The GRV, Guthrie Street, 11pm, free, 0131-220 2987

WINK: Gay clubbing night. DJ Michelle spins club anthems. GHQ, Picardy Place, 11pm, 4, 0845-166 6024

TALENTED: The Great Nardini, used mime to tell a story

Do we really need yet another festival? It is beginning to feel like every event that takes place in Edinburgh must now have the title of ‘Festival' just to add legitimacy. Yet it's rare that the Fringe, or the Festival proper for that matter, takes seriously the art of magic.

While most of the city's tourists associate the place with a certain boy wizard, descending on the Elephant House like it's a downed piata at an 8-year-old's birthday party, Kevin McMahon is aiming to change that perception. Artistic Director of Edinburgh's First International Magic Festival, he's provided quite a line-up of well-known acts. Celebrating the end of the festival last night in a Gala staged at the Lyceum, he paused to reflect on the success of the five-day event that has included children's workshops, competitive ‘Wizard Offs' and a chance for professional magicians to share tricks of the trade. Briefly thanking the assembled audience and magicians for their support, one was left with the impression that Edinburgh might just be able to squeeze yet another deserving diversion onto it's dance card.

Leaving the show's compering in the capable hands of comedian Gavin Oattes whose line in amusing gimmicks assures him an excellent future on the entertainment circuit, McMahon laid on an evening overflowing with smoke and mirrors. Leaning heavily towards comic magic, the line-up included current Magic Circle Stage Magician of the Year John Archer, Quick Change specialists and British Magic Grand Prix Champions Keelan Leyser and Charlotte Marie and French Mime Magician Xavier Mortimer, Mortimer's act standing out in particular for it's ingenious visual narrative. British offering, The Great Nardini, also followed the mime tradition with a beautifully crafted piece of comedic story telling.

Contributing the stereotypical sawing of a creature in half act was The Scottish Falsetto Sock Puppet Theatre. Observing the audience from their very own tartan clad theatre, the pair of socks managed to pull off an audience-pleasing riff on Halloween, if not the actual stunt itself. The real magic, however, lies in McMahon's ability to successfully pull off the same trick this time next year.

Josie Balfour

Valentine's Day (12),

AS the sun rises on the city, florist Reed (Ashton Kutcher) proposes to career-driven girlfriend Morley (Jessica Alba) and miraculously she accepts, to the surprise of his happily married right-hand man, Alphonso (George Lopez), and teacher best friend, Julia (Jennifer Garner). Elsewhere, Julia's fifth grade student Edison (Bryce Robinson) plots a surprise, the tyke's grandparents Estelle (Shirley MacLaine) and Edgar (Hector Elizondo) celebrate another year together, and TV sports reporter Kelvin (Jamie Foxx) woos agent Paula (Queen Latifah) and publicist Kara (Jessica Biel) for an exclusive on American football quarterback, Sean Jackson (Eric Dane). Meanwhile, in the skies above Los Angeles, US Army Captain Kate Hazeltine (Julia Roberts) shares her excitement about a surprise reunion with fellow passenger Holden (Bradley Cooper). Valentine's Day is a morass of cloying fairytale romances across the generations that predominantly end with a happy ever after or, at the very least, a comeuppance and emotional closure. Screenwriter Katherine Fugate has evidently overdosed on Richard Curtis's comedy Love Actually, penning her own version on the sun-baked streets of Los Angeles. Some of the plot strands are hopelessly contrived.

Warner Home Video, DVD 19.99/Blu-ray 24.99)

Leap Year (PG)

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Anna Brady (Amy Adams) is deliriously happy with cardiologist boyfriend Jeremy (Adam Scott) and, as their four-year anniversary approaches, she becomes convinced he is about to propose. He doesn't and heads off to Dublin instead for a conference. Following the lead of her father (John Lithgow), Anna spontaneously hatches a plan to propose to Jeremy in Ireland on Leap Day. However, her carefully plotted travel itinerary falls into disarray when bad weather forces the airplane to make a detour far from her intended destination of Dublin. Anna is understandably distraught and she calls upon the services of handsome innkeeper Declan (Matthew Goode) to help her travel all of the way to Dublin in time for February 29. Leap Year is a sappy road movie that clearly signposts every tiny pothole in the path to true love. To say the lead characters are an unlikely match would be an understatement: she's a fiercely independent interior designer from Boston; he's a lackadaisical chef from the nether regions of Ireland, about to lose his pub to the debt collectors. Anand Tucker's film is a terrible waste of Oscar nominee Adams' undeniable talents. Her globe-trotting heroine errs on the annoying, and we don't believe for an instant in the burgeoning attraction to Goode's wastrel with the wandering accent, who derides Anna's plan as "a load of old poo!" Screenwriters Deborah Kaplan and Harry Elfont clumsily contrive slapstick interludes, building to a happy ending. All that's missing are the leprechauns.

Optimum Home Entertainment, DVD 19.99/Blu-ray 24.99

Doctor Who - The Dominators (PG)

Patrick Troughton portrays the eponymous timelord in this five-part adventure set on the planet of Dulkis. The Dulcians have no weapons, so when the evil Dominators and their robotic minions, the Quarks, invade the tranquil world, the pacifist inhabitants are powerless to resist. Thankfully, the doctor and companions Jamie (Frazer Hines) and Zoe (Wendy Padbury) arrive on Dulkis for a holiday and they join the rebellion to overthrown the Dominators and restore peace to the galaxy before the aggressors launch an assault on Earth.

BBC DVD, DVD 19.99

1 CIRCUS: GERRY COTTLE

"This is a good show with lots of acts from Hungary, the Ukraine, Russia and Portugal," says Cottle, who regularly travels the world sourcing new acts.

"It's much easier than it was because now you have videos and DVDs, although you still have to see an act live before you book it. I remember trying to get together a big flying trapeze act some years ago to play Wembley. One act sent me this lovely video, they were great and I mentioned to a friend that I was thinking of hiring them. He said, ‘Have you seen them recently. They've all got fat.' So I went to see them and oh dear, they would have been an embarrassment."

Thankfully, the acts in the current tour, which marks the 50th anniversary of Cottle's running away from home, are all world class and include illusionist Ross Presto, acrobat Alina and her Magic Cube, the dangerous and glamourous Bugrovi Sisters, Hungarian trapeze act Trio Bokafi, the gymnastic Terski Brothers, Mongolian solo trapeze act Hitge and Angelo the clown.

"I was taught standing on the back of a horse, juggling andstilt-walking, but I was never a specialist, so I just made up the clowning and you can't do that. Clowning is a gift."

Gerry Cottle's Circus, Leith Links, Tuesday-Sunday, various times, 5.99-10, www.gerry-cottles-circus.co.uk

2 cinemA: PREDATORS (15)

Tenacious mercenary Royce (Adrien Brody) wakes in the sweltering heat of a jungle, where he stumbles upon other people in a similar disoriented state, including drug cartel enforcer Cuchillo (Danny Trejo), Russian Special Forces soldier Nikolai (Oleg Taktarov) and Israeli Defence Force sniper Isabelle (Alice Braga). Reconnaissance reveals that the group is stranded on an alien world with limited ammunition. The misfits are systematically hunted by a new breed of Predator, which is more cunning than before. As she cradles her rifle, Isabelle realises why she and Royce were hand-picked for the hunt. "It's because we're predators like them. We're the monsters in our own world."

General release, various times and prices

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3 THEATRE: THE GRUFFALO Acclaimed stage version of Julia Donaldson's much-loved book about a resourceful mouse and the nasty Gruffalo. Edinburgh Playhouse, Greenside Place, 1.30pm, 4pm, 14.25, 0844-847 1660

4 FOLK: ELIZABETH COOK plays appears with guitarist Tim Carroll, and bassist Bones Hillman. Leith Folk Club, The Village, South Fort Street, 8pm, 8, 07502-024852

5 talk: EDINBURGH FORTEAN SOCIETY Gordon Rutter will be speaking on ‘A History of Spirit Photography'. Bongo Club Holyrood Road, 8:30 pm, 1, 0131-558 7604

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