Postnatal depression 'is grieving for your old self'

THE loss of identity a woman feels after having a baby is so strong it can feel like they have suffered a bereavement, researchers say.

Losing their financial independence, work status and freedom has such as profound effect that they can find themselves grieving for their former self, a conference in Falkirk is due to hear tomorrow.

Melanie Clarke and Dr Cynthia McVey, from Glasgow Caledonian University, said that the pressures of modern life had led to rising rates of postnatal depression as women felt they had to "have it all".

It is estimated between 10 and 28 per cent of women will suffer postnatal depression. The British Psychological Society conference will hear that rates of postnatal depression could be reduced if this "bereavement" for the loss of their old self was considered a natural reaction which most will experience.

Mrs Clarke and Dr McVey interviewed new mothers with a history of postnatal depression. The women reported a feeling of being "lost". They had problems because of unrealistic expectations about childbirth and motherhood and because they had lost sight of the person they used to be.

Mrs Clarke said this led women to start grieving for their previous identity. "There are so many losses you experience when you have a child - the loss of your former freedom, your financial independence and so many other things which you had before.

"But the birth of a child is never framed as a loss. It is all roses around the door and this feeling that everyone should be happy," Mrs Clarke said. "This is especially so these days where women are under pressure to have great careers and a great family as well. They feel they have to have it all.

"But many women go through a grieving process over the loss of their former self when they have a child."

The researcher said there was a lot of pressure on new mothers to accept the losses, but this meant a grieving process - akin to normal bereavement - was necessary. She said that if post-natal depression was treated as a grieving process, women would have hope that they would emerge from the other side, as with any other bereavement.

Belinda Phipps, of the National Childbirth Trust, said: "

There is a lot of talk about getting back to your normal self, but when you go from being a daughter, sister, wife and add the identity of mother, it's is an irreversible condition."

• FEELING tearful and depressed after having a baby is common among many new mothers.

It can range from the less severe "baby blues" - lasting just a few days after birth - to postnatal depression which can take months to develop.

In the most serious but rare cases, postnatal psychosis may develop, leading to irrational behaviour, and confusion and suicidal thoughts. Experts say that women should seek treatment early if they think they have depression, and there are many treatments which can help stop postnatal depression.

This can include medication and counselling, while taking regular exercise is also thought to help.

But women are warned it can take a long time to fully recover from the condition.